The Watch Saga

Scene 1: The Timex Explorer watch is bravely purchased from Walmart in preparation for its long journey around the world. Anticipation is high. The Timex Explorer faces a dark airplane and two nights illuminating the African Serengeti by its warm Indigo light. Then, disaster strikes! The son of a Maasai chief has spotted the Timex and its built in compass. Like a sack of potatoes the watch is traded for a stick. BLACK OUT.


Scene 2: A haggard Adidas watch gets passed from store to store, then outlet to outlet, and finally from street vendor to street vendor in the markets of India. Long, hot nights pass. Adidas's looks have long faded with his youth, but he runs second by second, still dutifully marking time. His price has been taken down from the respectable Nike price of 1000 rupees to a measly knockoff price of 100 rupees ($2). He hopes for the day he will be bought and taken out to fulfill that noble purpose in life, measuring the moments of our lives. One day at long last, he is bought and whisked away. His time is changed multiple times as he zooms across time zones. Adidas gives it his all, second after second, minute after minute, hour after hour. He knows his time is short and it is not long before a large part of his plastic casing snaps off, but that will not deter his unbreakable spirit. He keeps going for two more days before sputtering to a halt, only able to manage a blink in each corner when the light that has long since broken is pressed. While only seeing his dreams fulfilled in the setting two weeks off his existence, Adidas's 122,872 clicks in that time were to him an eternity.


Scene 3: Rolex and Omega wander the rows of fake watches discussing the current news of the Pearl market stocks and bonds (futures of silk scarves are up while faux Gucci took a two point hit because someone misspelled "Guchi" on a large batch of purses). They walk right by 3 pointed silver star watch (3pss watch) without even noticing. 3pss is not even sure anymore whether it is his training not to be noticed, or whether he was just always invisible to high society. Built in one of the nameless factories by an unimportant wrench beside one of the thousands of smokestacks of his hometown, 3pss was a fluke of design. An almost attractive but mostly pointless 3 pointed silver star took up most of his dial. His too short and appallingly similar hour and minute hands were almost always obscured by that darned star. Doomed to be sold in some dollar store to a 7 year old who would not think twice before irreparably damaging the poor instrument, 3pss was about to pop out his own battery when a watch adorned with a Mau face saved him from oblivion. He was trained as a spy, taught the wisdom of Kung Fu, shown how to blend into the background when necessary and shine with a glint that even Movados would be envious of. And so it was that he had been biding his time silently waiting for that particular customer, dodging any type of sale by using his poorly designed facade to his advantage. Finally, the time came when that dark haired man with a big camera came by. 3pss heard the dark haired man be turned away by many venders because he wanted a knockoff watch for $3. Who ever heard of such a thing?! A $3 knock off watch in a Chinese market? But 3pss took his chance, dropping off his shelf just in time for the stallkeeper to notice and offer his cheapest watch to the dark haired man. Success of phase one. Five days would pass and the tension was building for 3pss. He would only have one shot...he had to be at his best. The dark haired man would be suspicious of getting a watch that was so shiny, but hopefully he would forget this detail. The moment was the upon 3pss. The streets of Thailand at 11 p.m. were hopping and the dark haired man wore a short sleeve shirt. Our spy shined like he had never shined before. Almost immediately he vanished like the master Kung Fu artist he was from the wrist of the dark haired man…into the pocket of a pickpocket and then on to his Thai contact. Who knows what secrets passed minute hands that day.


Scene 4: Enter stage right two cheap toys leaning against a toy box in the shadows. These are the rulers of the toy store in underpass 37. They work for Armani, the knockoff boss of all Turkish streets. Cheap toy number 1 spits some bubble yum in the spittoon before posing like the fluffy dinosaur that he is supposed to be. After the passing of the folks avoiding the road via the pedestrian underpass, toy 1 resumes his normal pleasure activities, the regular new toy shakedown. Under the thousands of disapproving evil eye charms hanging for sale in the store nearby, toy 1 and toy 2 approach our young hero, Casio. Built in the 80s but not turned on till 3 weeks ago, Casio was ready for this fight. The showdown began, sparks flew, but nothing could stop this firecracker. Heralded for weeks to come, Casio was eventually purchased for 4 Turkish Lyra ($3) and brought to America. The country had long since abandoned superman, but Casio was determined to fill his shoes. Only time will tell whether Casio will survive to defeat the evils of the world time and time again.



Here is hoping that my fourth watch will continue working!